K23

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K23, a fanzine for PIECES OF EIGHT, March 1992, by A. Vincent Clarke, 16 Wendover Way, Welling Kent, DA16 2BN. Goro-goro is used for sounds, such as the purring of a cat, or for rumbling noises (such as thunder or heavy objects); but it is also used to express manner, such as the state of discomfort caused by a lump, the way in which things are strewn around in abundance, or the state of being idle. Cambridge Enc. of Language on Japanese Onomatopeia.15

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UPDATE

As you may guess from the above, I succumbed to the advert. quoted in the last 'K' and sent off for the opening offer of the TSP (The Softback Preview). The Cambridge Encylopedia is an unalloyed joy – you will continue to see quotes. The Hutchinson Encyclopedia, tho' written in a very small type, is up-to-date – 'youngest' entries are about a year old – but has no illustrations. Coming of Age in the Milky Way is an extremely well-written history of astronomy, also full of quotes. I'm well satisfied with these selections.

(Also, serendipity strikes again – a cursory weighing showed the three books to total nearly 6lb. (2.6 Kg), which is almost exactly how overweight I am from my optimum. Fancy carrying that around with one unneccessarily! Resolve to watch diet).

Otherwise, I received back the photos I sent across to the States (the book for which they're intended will now have 230+ shots of '50s fans), heard with misgivings the news about the Foundation (much money wanted), met the Ph.D I mentioned in K22 who's investigating John Wyndham, did a lot of electro-stencils, and had a new phone. Good month.

YET MORE ON BOOKS

Central London, in the Charing Cross Road area, is littered with remainder book shops, those establishments which live on the sale of books that their respective publishers want to chuck out for various reasons – too many printed, space needed, new edition being made, etc. There are even some of these shops in the suburbs – respectable Orpington has one, much to my delight as I can get there on a bus from the top of the road – and of course most other cities have at least one.

But there is, as far as I know, only one mail-order business in this field, Bibliophile. Every month or two their catalogue, in tabloid newspaper format, comes in and presents me with half-an-hour of fantasy – window-shopping in Charing Cross Road, you might say.

The latest issue (No.98) has just arrived and it occurred to me that some of the books on offer might be suited to members of PoE.

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Maureen, for instance – she'd probably like Tricks Your Cat Can Do; "you will find your cat will not only learn to perform surprising tricks but will enjoy it", or for her and other cat people there's A Catland Companion or The English Cat at Home or Through a Cat's Eyes. Darroll would theoretically go for Choosing Reality, the author of which bases 'his arguments on the "centrist" position of Buddhism'.

Theo might like Cobbett's Tour in Scotland or Loch Ness, or The Enterprising Scot, and Ken English Coloured Books (edition published 1990 @ £40, now reduced to £10 – not, one would think, a publishing success). And for Sarah and Eunice there's copies of Centuries of Female Days – '300 years of diary writing by Englishwomen'.

There's also a good selection of quotes in the section headings, such as Woody Allen's "Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions", or Bernard Ingham's "As I told a member of the Polish government bewailing the difficulties of governing the Poles in 1988: 'Try running Yorkshire County Cricket Club.'"

But here am I wandering on, and time to the next deadline shrinks....a few hurried

COMMENTS ON FEB 1992 MAILING

THROUGH THE LOUDHAILER – Blackheart hisself

Nice going, and a passing stab of envy on the ability to insert a different typeface into the text. Your pleas to reluctant subbers remind me of my own feelings when a fan to whom I lent a rare '50s (Willis) fanzine confessed after a year that he'd lost it in his piles of papers. No use being too soft-hearted.

COTTAGE PIE No.3 – Ian Bambro

S'funny, it's only a month or so since, wanting a change of bedside reading, I selected from a huge pile of unreads Instant Gold, and was so impressed that I tried to find out who Frank O'Rourke was – or rather, who might have been concealed behind that bland Irish name.

Actually, the book was a bit of a let-down, as having spelt out the consequences of a huge supply of gold, O'Rourke just lets it lie there. The absurdity of basing an economy on the disposition of chunks of raw metal is pretty self-evident, but it's nice to read such a civilised satire on the idea.

As for Terry Bisson, if I said I'd heard the name before that wouldn't be of much help, would it?

Hesseltine looks as tho' there's a half-brick winging his way, doesn't he? You don't have to reinforce my feelings about the Tories – I haven't had any time for them in the last 40 years.

The Law Report interesting – nice to know that a 'carefully fashioned' (?) stone object has some standing in an English court, even if it isn't a juristic entity. My new Encyclopedia of Language says: "...total lack of punctuation. The reasons for this distinctive feature of legal style are not entirely clear, but they probably have to do with the early use of punctuation as a graphic device to help people read texts aloud. Most legal documents are purely written records... when these documents came to be printed... compositors developed the practice of printing texts without any punctuation...the tradition grew...."

The 'Small is Beautiful' saying has always affected my comments on fanzines, to the point where, paradoxically, it's far far harder to LoC massive fanzines than small ones. A lot of massive American and Australian efforts fall by my wayside in that respect – I'm still marshalling the forces to comment when the next issue arrives.

RYCT Kench, I too have a neutral (at best) attitude to cats – tend to put them in the same category as football and Coronation Street. The charm eludes me.

The punch recipe takes me back to...oh, 1955 or somewhen thereabouts, when we held a Convention in Kettering. (Why we held a Con in Kettering was because in '54 Manchester had burnt its collective fingers during the Super-Mancon and no one was anxious to be the sacrificial lamb next time (what a change from these days!) so for three years running Kettering held a Con, mostly because there was one neofan there who volunteered.

Anyway, someone – I think it was Ted Tubb – had previously decided that it would be fun (that shows you how long ago it was) to have a Convention party, a punch party. We had solemnly brought a large plastic washing-up bowl up from London, and at the end of the afternoon proceedings it was taken on to the stage. Ted announced that everyone was invited to the party – as long as they contributed to the punch bowl. Or more correctly, the punch washing-up basin.

You know how, if you disturb an ants' nest, there's an awful lot of to-ing and fro-ing? That was the Convention hall. People melted out of the doors and ransacked the town, coming back with bottles of sherry, rum, gin, cider, and other drinks and paper cups. Bottles were upended into the basin and paper cups were dipped.

Yes, it was quite unscientific. I told this story to Greg Pickersgill once, an accomplished party punch maker, and he didn't stop shuddering for five minutes. I have no excuse except that it seemed like a good idea at the time.

I was holding back on taking my place at this gargantuan trough, partly because as a sort of Committee member I was being polite and letting other people go first, partly because I was standing next to a fan whose bent was chemistry. He was asking me questions about what the washing-up bowl was made of and scribbling down formulae on the back of an envelope.

He finished at last, and his brow cleared. "I was worried about whether the bowl would stand up to it" he said, "but it's all right. If it breaks down, it breaks down into alcohol" ... and he went to join the throng on the stage.

MARAUDER – Ken Cheslin

Very nice cover.

RYCT Steve. John Roles was an interesting L'pool fan. Started out quite sercon and was corrupted into a fun-loving individual. I remember him chiefly for the fantastic things he used to submit to OMPA, the first Brit. APA, including an edible fanzine on rice-paper and also a small 'zine duplicated in half-a-dozen colours on half-a-dozen different coloured pages.

RYCT me. Yes, 'Tenement Symphony' was the one with a typewriter & bell in it.

RYCT Chris. Only 60 new books in 1750? Sounds incredibly low.

Incidentally, I looked up an old book to pinpoint 1750, and altho' there was no reference to books there was the curious note: 17,000 geneva shops abolished. I presume that this has reference to places selling gin, but wonder what the kerfuffle was about. Anyone know?

Lot of hair on display on that bacover photo – which is your son 'n' heir?

Re. 'folk turning fannish skills to good account', I don't know what Ella Parker may have accomplished, but Dorothy Ratigan, wife of fan/artist Jim, thought she'd earn a little pin money (as they used to call it) by typing out fan's manuscripts, and advertised herself as Fantasy Secretary. Not sure that it was much of a success, tho' full marks for courage. I'd have hated to read some fan's mss.

K22 – self

Nothing much to mention here except that the time allowed on that BBC show for constructing a word using 3 computer-generated letters should have been 4 seconds, not five.

Re. the Wyndham fan Doctor previously mentioned (his Ph.D was in the history of political philosophy), I dug through various ancient stories and photos for him but... I suppose none of you know a zine called TALES OF THE FRIGHTENED, allegedly published late '50s? No reference books I have mention it. I've pointed the Doc. towards one Frank Parnall, who edited a 600 page book called Monthly Terrors on fantasy and weird zines, but feel this is a really obscure one.

APOLOGIES AND BURBLE – Jenny Glover

Can't comment much, except that your characterisation of James White as 'gentle' is right on.

I was reading The Oxford Book of Literary Anecdotes recently (good bedside book), and came across the following in relation to Alfred Northcliffe, Viscount Harmsworth, one of the early 'Press Barons': "Somewhere about the age of twelve, Master Harmsworth became possessed of a jelly-graph for the reproduction of MS in violet ink, and with this he set himself up to produce a mock newspaper. JV ((J.V. Milne, headmaster and father of A.A. Milne)) with the soundest pedagogic instinct, seized upon the possibilities of this display of interest and encouraged young Harmsworth, violet with copying ink and not quite sure whether he had done well or ill, to persist with the Henley House Magazine even at the cost of his school work."

That, incidentally, was written by H.G. Wells.

YOU ARE HERE(ish) 2 (and Watcher from the Shadows) – Jenny & Steve Glover

Nice smooth writing, pertinent comments. I note the two incidents involving Tara, and sympathise. When my Nicki went to secondary school, religious instruction was a voluntary home-work subject, so I told the school to stick it, but in diplomatic language. Nicki was slightly annoyed at this – not because she missed the homework (she wasn't that abnormal) – but because it made her different from the rest of her class. It's the old deep psychological imperative again – kids must conform to their peer group.

She kept on in the Brownies, bought one or two books on Black Magic and similar for herself (as well as a bible), had one of her 'O' levels in religion, was married in church and hasn't shown the slightest interest in the stuff for the last 10 years. Like most Brits, will go into church three times in her life. Well – in her case twice; she wasn't baptized.

So unless Tara is strongly suggestible, I'd tread delicately. Take the long view; with two intelligent parents she has a good start in life.

STRUMPET CONFIDENCE (I think) – Kev McVeigh

I criticised you on unemployment? I'm sorry – I can't remember the circumstance (and been back to mailings since June '91, stuff immediately to hand), but if I hurt I'm deeply sorry.

Yes, Thatcher may have urged people to get out on the streets and oppose their government – and heaven forbid that I should say one syllable in defence of that ghastly woman – but there's a difference between when you have a free vote and when you haven't. Yes, I know that there's a lot of hypocrites amongst politicians, and the Press is heavily biased, but however slip-shod the system is, we live in a democracy where a half-brick through a window doesn't count in the ballot box. You don't think Ian and Maureen and Ken and myself (and for all I know most others in this small group) like a right-wing government, do you? But if we had a situation where any group with sufficient fire-power could impose their will....well, you're an sf reader, you imagine it.

Like the comments.

SHREDS OF CANVAS etc. 7 – Eunice Pearson

Don't like the sound of your office. Isn't there some way you could slip an anonymous tip to the Health and Safety Executive? And there's a lot of philosophical questions raised here about the present society where young mothers have to go out to work. Having said that, I'd have thought that with a 20 hour part-time job there would have been time to look for somewhere more congenial? What a mess the government have made of this country!

The engraved heading very Victorian dramatic – I take it that is a body in foreground?

THE ARACHNO FILE – John D. Rickett

Like the double columns. Marvellous account of a Night at the Opera.

RYCT me on Fantasia and Beethoven's Sixth. Nope – doesn't lead to any mental images of bucolic (and alcoholic) Greece with me when I listen to it again. Tho' it may be different for some people – I remember when Nicki was young she'd hang about the tape recorder going "Bwoom? Bwoom?" – she wanted to hear 'Sorcerer's Apprentice', presumably because it brought back mental pictures of Fantasia's Mickey Mouse's sweeping operations.

I pass on listing 10 books for a desert island this time, but it's a pleasant task to send oneself to sleep with....also to fantasise. Would you be able to keep your own disintegrating (?) personality distinct from the characters or would you merge, like Woody Allen's story of Madame Bovary, into someone elses scenery ("Who is this character on page 100? A bald Jew kissing Madame Bovary?" Side Effects)

Ummm – I don't think many of my books would be SF either. Probably DIY would figure largely, ie. How to Build A Raft Using Only Palm Trees. And, dammit, that's got me thinking again – you and your time-travel fantasy – a favourite subject of mine when drifting off to sleep: what would you do if, like de Camp's hero, you were deposited in Ancient Rome (or like Mark Twain's hero, at the court of King Arthur) with only the clothes you stood up in and your fine mind. How would one cope?

Like the assortment of small illos on your last page. Can your machine use clip-art, or do you have to load a desk-top publishing program first?

THE STRUTHIAN PERSPECTIVE – Theo Ross

That's a very nice tribute to your Miss Butler. Must have been a helluva teacher. Would it have been this incident which helped to mould your interests?

My memory isn't as good as yours – I'd read Bring on the Empty Horses but had entirely forgotten Mr. Kowalski.

Most of this STRUTHIAN is uncommentable on, being a delight to read but free association. But thanks for the explanation from your informant on the lack of anaesthetic dart guns...it sounds a little far-fetched (which is what the guns would have to be ha-ha) but I suppose anyone who acts contrary to the rules of civilised society (no spitting on sidewalk, no waving guns around) is asking for it. (But even then it's a bit mind-boggling; do they have an assortment of darts allocated to different weights of animal? What sorts of limits are there, poundage wise? I mean, would a fat man need measurably more anaesthetic than a thin one?)

As for your query re. the presence of a sparrow preventing me from using the loo, well, I guess I felt kinda shy. And maybe a vagrant thought about that bird that nipped off someone's nose. (Dear me – I re-learnt all those nursery-rhymes and stories once when Nicki was young, and now realise I have to re-learn them for grandchild).

TRAVELS IN HYPER-REALITY – Maureen Speller

Matter of fact, I tried to make this New Year different by a Resolution – giving up sugar in coffee and tea. I stuck to it through 28 days, but then through a slight medical mishap (was given too strong an anti-phlebitis pill and had a 1½ hr. nose-bleed – and people have sweetened tea after blood transfusions, don't they?) lapsed right back into the old ways. I remember those 28 days of dish-water drink with a shudder.

I'm pretty sure that Benetton just want to get their name in the public's mind, and from the look of this TiHR have succeeded. Interesting phenomenon for some future researcher to study.

Nice reproduction, and some good decisive writing too.

A KIND OF SENSE – Brian Stovold

What sort of programme did you borrow – Mini-Office? The magazine 8000 PLUS ran a long series on this if you want me to look it up and copy. I understand that the instructions leave something to be desired – like sense.

You certainly live a life that leaves me feeling like the proverbial hermit, especially the restoring canals bit. Be a bit awkward to have the canal going around a reservoir I guess. In this part of the world there's a lot of worry about lack of rain and low water tables; local papers run stories of local rivers drying up, etc. Of course, just because I have to go out to post this tonight to beat the deadline it appears to be raining outside, the first time it's done so for weeks.

Nice cover – not haw-haw-haw but pleasant.

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(Inspiration utterly fails – can't manage another half-inch).